Home again

I am back home again and coming to terms with everything that has happened in the last three weeks.

Carole died on Tuesday 6th April at about 5am.  The phone rang at 5.15 am and as soon as it rang Rob, myself and Allan all knew what it was.  Carole died very peacefully in her sleep, a real kindness after weeks of struggle and wasting away.

One of the amazing things was that over Easter Carolewas able to communicate and on the Sunday she asked Rob to take her for a walk in the wheelchair.  He took her out into the park outside and she was able to enjoy a perfect Autumn day.

Barry was down for the weekend and made his peace with Carole.  He certainly gave Rob and me a wide berth, but at least he won't have the burden of still being on bad terms with her on his conscience.

On Monday, Carole was very weak.  But when I left I said to her I love you, and she said I love you too.  And she said remember me.  I told her she will always be in my heart.  That was our last exchange.

I had said to her that she was surrounded by angels, and taht when she was ready,  just look for the low flying one and catch a ride to heaven.  I hope that she did and was greeted by her father. 

Two days after we found out that despite all the effort we put into getting the Social Work Department to work up a will for her, it wasn't done.

We were under the impression it had been done, and Carole spoke as if it had been done.  It was devastating to find out that it hadn't been done.  And now there will be death taxes to be paid and it will take forever to sort out.

Carole's funeral was on Friday.  Both her sons and her two Australian based brothers and their wives were there.

Before the funeral, Barry apologised to Rob for all the trouble he had caused and the things he had said.  We were all relieved, but it didn't last long.

After the funeral we allw ent to the Gunner's Arms in Launceston for lunch and memories.  Rob told me that Barry had approached him and said he knew there was $50,000 to be shared between him and Allan and then asked what was being done with Carole's jewellery.  So much for his apology.

Rob is seeing a solicitor, but the Public Trustee office told me that with items in Carole's name only - such as her bank account - the rule is that the first $50,000 goes to the husband and anything more is divided between children (two-thirds) and the spouse (one-third).

I have no idea what is going to happen, but it is not going to be pleasant.  And I feel so sorry for Rob.  He has enough to deal with without this additional stress.

Just as well Allan is so different.

After Carole's funeral he got incredibly drunk and when he came in he wanted to talk.  he told me how much he had appreciated what I had done for him and what a top bird I was and how much he loved Mum and Dad and especially Rob.  He is such a sweet guy and feels so lost without his Mum.  More than anything, he wanted to know there were people who still loved him.  I know how much Mum, Dad and Rob (and I) love him.  If I could adopt him I would.