Relaxing and destressing

I am having just the weekend I needed - quiet and relaxing.  I am doing some cooking - making a great potato soup.  And also have been doing some hand sewing and sorting out some of my photos from my trip.  I have put together a photo album for Dee celebrating my time in the Pacific North West.  It has been fantastic going back through my photos and remembering the fun we had. 

A great visit

Back home after six days in Launceston, with nothing but good news for a change.

Carole has recovered well from the last set back and every day you can see her looking stronger.  She has lost a LOT of weight, but is smiling and laughing and determined to come home next week after by then more than four weeks in hospital.

Her son, Allan arrived yesterday and after getting over the shock of seeing her so thin is happy to see her feeling so up. her other son arrives on Saturday.  other family members are also coming this weekend to help her celebrate her birthday, which is Monday.  Her brother Ian is also talking of flying over from Scotland.

I can't believe how far she has come in the last week.  She has also started her next round of chemo.  Becauswe of her weakened state they devised a way to split it over several days so that the potential shock to her system is reduced.  This was so good to know, as the doctors had told Rob they were very concerned that she would not be strong enough to tolerate it.  But after a day and a half of infusion she is doing so well.

I am planning on going down again for Easter in three weeks.  I am hoping that once she is home she will continue to get stronger.

Normal service has been resumed

I rang Carole this morning to say hi and have a chat and found that there had been a crisis last night I knew nothing about.

It turned out while they were putting in the port she vomited and aspirated some into her lungs.  She came out of the operation in a terrible condition and Rob was told she was not expected to last the night.  they also told him atht if she had a heart attack they would not revive her.  Rob was in tears when he went in to see her thinking it was the end.

Well she made it through the night and is in much better shape today.  She is on strong antibiotics and receiving physio to help make sure any gunk is out of the lungs.

I was so shocked when I found out.  I just couldn't believe that yet another thing had happened following an operation at this bloody hospital.  I just wish we could get her out of there and take her somewhere decent.

I have spent most of the afternoon crying and trying just not to fall apart completely.  God this is just so awful.

At last some good news

The big news is Dad's tumour is responding well to chemo and has shrunk considerably.  He was due to have another infusion today but his white cell count was too low so they postponed it to next week.

Carole was having a port put in today so she can have another round of chemo to try and shrink her tumour to buy some more time.  I so hope she and Rob can have some good time together.  If they can make their second wedding anniversary in June that would be wonderful.

I had a game of bridge tonight - first time in weeks.  First couple of hands I played like a nutter, but we got our act together after four rounds and picked up.  We got quite a few tops towards the end, so hopefully they will cancel out the early boards.

Planning to say goodbye

I had a talk with Mum tonight.  She went in to see Carole twice today.  The first time she said Carole looked terrible and was in very low spirits.  And the second time Carole was in better spirits.  Mum warned me that Carole's condition has deteriorated considerably since I saw her in January/

It is hard to think it is only a few weeks since I saw her and that she has gone downhill so fast.

I spoke with Carole the other day and she told me she feels God has let her down.  I didn't know what to say and am still struggling, but I think it isn't God that has failed her but poor actions by doctors.  She had been doing so well right up until October when the idiot doctor took her off the chemo and didn't schedule the surgery as they were supposed to.  I feel cheated out of time with her and want so much to have more time with her, but I know we aren't going to get a miracle.

I hope Rob is able to get some help so she can come home, even if for a short time.  Mum said Rob is realising that she may not be able to come home, and it is so sad that he can't take the dogs in to see her, as that would lift her spirits more and help the dogs deal with what is happening.  I checked and found that there isn't a hospice in Launceston, so that option is not open, and Mum said that the hospital cubicle Carole is in is terrible, so if we can find a way to bring her home, she would be happier, and she and Rob would be able to have more time together.

Mum had to ask Rob if Carole has a will.  What a sad thing to have to even think about.

Not good news

I have been putting off writing this because writing it makes it too real.  But yesterday we got the news we knew was coming.  Carole's Oncologist has told her that the tumour in her peritoneum is unlikely to respond to treatment.  Rob was still feeling shocked last night but is coping as well as could be expected.

He wants to organise for her to come home from the hospital, even if for only part of the time.  I think that would be good for them both.

Carole's eldest son Barry knows, but her youngest son, Allan, is gadding about in Europe with some mates and is hard to track down.  I hope Barry is able to find Allan quickly so he can get home and have some time with Carole.

Mum is going down to Launceston on Saturday to help Rob.  But with Dad due for a scan and possibly more chemo next week, he can't go with her, at least until we know what is happening with him.  Mum is stressing out about leaving him.  I offered to go up and stay with Dad, but he got into a high dudgeon and is happy to be on his own and call on friends if needed.

It is so hard being stuck on the sidelines.  I want to do something to help, but it is hard to know what.

I picked up the quilt I have been working on for Carole from the long arm quilter last night and will start on the binding this afternoon.  I plan to drive up to Sydney on Saturday morning to meet up with Mum and give her the quilt to take to Carole with her.  I'll be putting up photos later.

A work in progress

Alright, I can't just sit here.  I joined in a quilters UFO (=unfinished objects) group.  Here is one of the two UFOs I want to get done.

 

There are two main colourways in this one - soft pastels and greens

 

  

This is going to be for Abbey West - her special big girl quilt.